“Every Maiden isn’t young. Every Mother doesn’t have a child. Every Crone isn’t old.”
- Zita Christian moonriverrituals.com
I’m feeling more and more these days that life is like an onion. I’m certain someone has already made this analogy somewhere..... Onions can make you cry and cry and cry without really having control of the tears AND can taste very sweet and tender when gently sauteed with the best olive oil and salt and pepper.
The first layers of my onion life: Maiden
The youngest of two girls in my family, I was the “tom boy” maiden. I could be found high up in trees, the only girl on all boys baseball team, and would rather be moving in all and any manner possible. The maiden me was always curious and a bit daring.
Then came the clothes the shoes the hair and the boys with fast cars. Boyfriends, girlfriends, and then friend friends… The competitive years athletically promptly followed by the competitive years socially.
First engagement – broke my heart, broke his heart. From here the slow slow shift to “mother” but when it came it came FULL on….
The next layers of the life onion: Mother
My first son was born when I was 23. Young, yes I know, but for whatever reason it seemed like the right reason and 27 years later I realize there never really was any other reason. Somehow I knew early on that I would be a young mother and that these amazing kids were out there for me to learn and grow from and be given the incredible gift of exploring mother hood with them. All three of my sons were born before I was 28, 9 years later my daughter was born. Along with this family came the MARRIAGE, the real one, the one with a capital M!
The next layers of my life's onion: Yet to be named…
I just can’t subscribe to title of “Crone” yet. I do understand all the beautiful implications and depth and honor that "crone" carries. However, I just do not yet feel like the social stigmas attached to this word doesn’t bother me, it does, my ego shrieks. A better Buddhist may not, but I am only human and recently over 50.
The CHANGE-ish, things have shifted, that is for certain, your body doesn't lie. Hormones a tad imbalanced on occasion, not quite the same responsiveness in my skin, yes its wrinkled and saggy in spots, I'm wearing "readers". The three of four children are grown and venturing into their own onion layers. As I explore this new realm of my life I will let you know when I come up with a name for it!
As I continue to peel back the layers of my life I'm sure I'll be crying and savoring the sweetness.